Somewhere That Person Is

"... I know he hurt your feelings so badly, but your love isn't fading. I'm wishing, hoping, praying you'll find the guy that'll never hurt you and will love you like no other.", a friend told me.

Apparently, she knew about him. I've had mixed emotions as we we're talking about how I am feeling, earlier. I, too, have been hoping I'd find that kind of person though I can't help but also hope the one who use to bring me to tears is that one we were both hoping I'd meet. But still, I know he might no longer be the one my friend wants for me. I'm insane.

She just want the best for me, and I must admit that things she tells me might be right. Like, I have to move on. But we both know that no matter how I try, I still can't. She just knew how much I feel for that person and I am thankful enough she understand why it's too hard for me to do. I don't want her to worry about me and she does everytime she gets to know that I'm almost breaking down in pain. But I don't wanna lie, either. I don't wanna tell her such lies, like I already moved on.

You can say that I am insane, indeed. I don't know what that person have done to me. I was almost perfectly fine until I met him. And now, he's someone I can't easily forget. Whenever he's there or even when he's not, it hurts. It's stupid 'cause holding on to what I feel just keeps on hurting me but look, I still can't learn exactly, how to let go of it, even if some things tell me this wouldn't get me anywhere. Can anybody help me realize the right thing for me to do?

Eversince I've felt this way, I've forgotten the kind of guy I wanna be with... The kind of guy, my friend would gladly want me to be with. I've wanted someone who could make me smile the real smile. Someone who could make me feel special. Someone who could make me cry, but would never ever try. And then it all didn't matter to me. I just wanna love and be loved back. Hmm... idk, maybe these things are gonna change. But somewhere that person is, is where part of my heart would be.