Tuesday, November 5, 2013

A Whisper Through Deep Pain

Earlier, I wasn't sure if I can check my online accounts or if  I really want to. I'm currently in the state of so much pain. It's the kind of pain I never knew before. I don't think I can spend time for such stuff as browsing and surfing the complicated web. Some things right now are already complicated enough for me to do that, I thought. I'd rather lie down on my bed, cry and think things through. But I know I needed to get up and do something or I'll end up in total despair. Yeah, that's the reason I am here, and even trying to blog something up although it isn't really part of the plan. Why? Here's the story.

So, I started to sign in to my accounts. Gmail first, as usual. Typing the characters, I feel like wanting to weep again. Just lately, tears were like gatecrashers bursting out of my eyes uninvited. But I was trying to hold back. It seemed like I'm going to faint. Yet, I still went on ignoring it and  like a whisper, these words fell in front of me...


and like a sweet sweet song, struck my heart.Those were the first words I read on my email account soon as the page loaded. Such a truth I would've almost forgotten. I knew it is for me. Oh, the Lover of my soul reminded me that He knows how I feel. My Savior, Redeemer, my very best Friend is thinking of me and does each and every way to make me feel that I am not forsaken. That I am not alone. He understands every pain, sees each tear and hears my cry. He weeps as I weep. Right now it seems more real to me. Overwhelming, yes. And wonderful.

Suddenly, I am also reminded of a dear sister in Christ's message after one of the few shortest verses in the Bible.

"Jesus wept." (John 11:35)
If you doubt that Jesus cares, remember His tears.

I wasn't doubting about how much He cares. I even know that no one understands the pain that I'm going through, except Him. And that, He's healing me. I know that. I claim that. But to have Him speak to me in such a personal and heartfelt way, and at the moment I needed to hear it the most is so amazing. Jesus knows how I feel... true enough! He might even feel it stronger than I do.And it doesn't stop there. He's doing something for me, to bring back the smile on my face which I kind of lost, to stir up the joy He has set upon my heart and fill me with overflowing gladness and love. With those words, it's as if He's saying, take courage my bride... do not lose heart, do not faint. I am right beside you and I will be here with you always. (Not to mention the playlist on my blog that I am currently listening to which communicate His love for me as I type this post up...) Sweet! He cares for me that much.

And so, I'll hold on ever to this: When tears come my way again, I'll remember His and remind myself that I matter to Him. All is going to be well with me. And whatever circumstances you're going through, let these words encourage you... Jesus knows how you feel, too. :)

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Another Night in February

© mariakath

I wasn't waiting for this moment but it still came
I was trying to ignore
But there was no escape
Dimming lights caught me up once more
All I knew was that it's you I'm looking for

Don't wanna hold anybody else's hands but yours
Don't wanna dance with anyone, just with you alone
Yes, it was another wishful thinking
And I can't help but ask myself such things
Like, will I ever really see the lights dance in your eyes?
Will I ever feel the warmth brought up by your smile?

I wanna hear the music sweet as you say my name
But like those yesterdays, everything seemed just the same
In this cold and dreary evening,
your absence make me tired of waiting...
Hey, it's another night in February
And I'm still wishing you were here with me

Healthy Heart, Anyone?

Most of us desire to become physically fit. Everyone has their own way of gaining and maintaining good physical condition. Some talk about taking a strict diet and scheduled exercise to trim weight. Others are active in different kinds of sports and vigorous activities.

Even I am surrounded by health-conscious friends. Some of them spend several hours at the gym to develop their body figure. During the past school breaks, we have spent a couple of mornings jogging in the humid areas of our town and even hiked up on a hill. On those times, I’ve been able to breathe like I’ve never breathe the same fresh air before. Although I don’t really possess the ideal body shape, I knew these activities somehow conditioned me.

I came to realize more about the significance of achieving physical wellness as far as everyone knows. However in contrast, most people are not aware of the importance of being fit, spiritually. Living a healthy spiritual lifestyle starts with the condition of the heart.
In chapter 4 of Proverbs (NLT) it is written, “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life” (v.23). A healthy heart is a heart which beats not bitterness, envy, anger, or hatred, but love. It is one which follows after the will of God. The Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart” (1 Sam. 16:7). Therefore, knowing that God sees what’s within; we must present a heart that pleases Him. But how can we possibly achieve a well-conditioned heart? Few of the steps instructed in the Bible are as follows:

1.       “Avoid all perverse talk; stay away from corrupt speech” (Prov. 4:24). It is essential to learn how to tame our tongue. To be able to keep our mouth right, we should avoid tolerating deeds that are definitely wrong—such as gossips, spreading rumors or voicing out malicious words. As Proverbs 18:21 says, Words kill, words give life; they're either poison or fruit—you choose” (MSG). Even a single word can change a person’s life. It’s either for the better, or for the worse. Thus, we must think before we speak.

2.       “Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you” (v.25). Focus on the right direction. Sometimes, we do not have control over what our eyes happen to see, but we are given the ability to choose how we are going to respond to it. And also, “The only source of light for the body is the eye. If you look at people and want to help them, you will be full of light. But if you look at people in a selfish way, you will be full of darkness. And if the only light you have is really darkness, you have the worst kind of darkness.” (Matthew 6:22-23, ERV)

3.       “Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path” (v.26).  Set our feet on the right track. Don’t let anything or anyone break our stride. “Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil.”(v.27). Never let these pull us away from the road we take. As we go on, we must resist the temptations and overcome the circumstances that get on the way. One word: FOCUS! It is also for us to decide whether we are going to take the path which leads to destruction or the path which leads to life. Always remember that where we are right now is where we have chosen ourselves to be.

If we’re able to maintain physical fitness but are not pursuing a healthy spiritual lifestyle, we will miss out the chances of achieving the essential benefits from it which God has promised to give. At first it seems too hard to practice, but when we fully desire to follow what He has instructed us to do, everything will come out naturally. And one last thing: Nothing we do can ever be difficult, as long as we do it for the glory of God. Keep in mind that spiritual well-being starts with the heart. We usually go after our own desires, but a really healthy heart follows after the will of God.